Stephanie Mills Confessed Worst Regret & Insecurity While Married To Shalamar Star

Posted On : July 31, 2018

Shalamar Portrait Session
Shalamar (L-R) Jeffrey Daniel, Jody Watley and Howard Hewett; 1981 (Photo by Michael Ochs Archives/Getty Images)

A while back, when we published an article about Stephanie Mills being married to a Shalamar singer back in the day, we realized many people had no clue about them. However, most of their fans were still pleasantly surprised. Although Stephanie and Shalamar’s, Jeffrey Daniel, divorced years ago, we wanted to share excerpts from an Ebony Magazine interview Mills did soon after they’d split, because the honesty and pain she revealed about their love, still resonates today. Stephanie and Jeffrey split in 1982, but didn’t officially divorce until ’83, after just three years of marriage.

Mills’ Biggest Regret About Marriage To Daniel

Stephanie Mills and her then husband, Shalamar member, Jeffrey Daniel
Stephanie Mills and her then husband, Shalamar member, Jeffrey Daniel

Stephanie says that one of biggest regrets ” is that I didn’t have a baby for my husband. God knows I tried, but it’s something that just never happened. He wanted a son, and I’d still like to have it for him.”

When asked if having a baby for Daniel would have ‘saved their marriage’ at that time, Mills replied:

“Probably, I think it might help,” stated Mills.

She then addressed how her and Daniel’s short marriage unfortunately fit into the celeb’ marriage stereotype:

“I suppose that suggests that ‘show business marriages’ don’t have very good chances of surviving,” Stephanie says. “Both partners are so much in the public eye all the time and when you add that to all the other problems that come up in a ‘normal’ marriage, the picture’s not very bright. Maybe Jeffrey and I will have to do like some other couples- divorce, give ourselves a little time and space, then marry again. Maybe in-between we’ll learn all the lessons a couple has to learn in order to make a marriage survive,” Mills stated at the time of their separation.

Her Biggest Insecurity That Jeffrey Daniel Helped Eliminate

The beautiful 4’9″ songstress also confessed one of her biggest insecurities and how Jeffrey helped her to overcome it, despite their drama:

“Some people might find this hard to believe, but my marriage to Jeffrey Daniel was the greatest thing that could’ve happened to me. See, I’ve gone through some real changes at various times of my life, but because of Jeffrey, I’m now very happy with myself. All my life I tried to be the best I could be and I tried to look the best I could look. I always knew there are no perfect people in the world, but I had some problems about being a short person, and I suppose every girl wonders if she’s as attractive as someone else. As an entertainer, I know society has a thing about beauty. People are into that tall-pretty-girl-with-long-hair thing, you know. … I used to feel intimidated when I was around those gorgeous ladies, but I don’t feel that way anymore.”

When asked if therapy also helped her overcome her short complex,  Mills adamantly gave all props to Jefferey about this:

“Oh, no. It was Jeffrey Daniel,” she says. “He never stopped telling me that he loved me the way I was. He never tried to change me, and he told me I didn’t have to always wear high-heel shoes, for example. He told me, ‘Stephanie, if I’d wanted a tall woman I’d have married one. So don’t wear high heels for me. I love you in sneakers, barefooted, any way you want to be.’ He meant that and it went a long way in helping me change what I’d thought of myself at times. Now I think I’m tall as anyone else, I think I look good as anyone else.”

Stephanie Mills with her then husband/Shalamar singer, Jeffrey Daniels (via Facebook)

Overcoming Their Painful Divorce

Stephanie also stated she eventually realized that then 22 year old Jeffrey was too young at that time, to be a ‘responsibly’ married man. Although their marriage was plagued by cheating rumors and rumors of hostile arguments and/or altercations, she admitted their split took a painful toll on her:

“When Jeffrey and I first separated, I thought my whole world had collapsed. I didn’t think I was going to make it…. Here I was in this big house and I’d never really been alone. But let me tell you something. One day I got  up and went to the mirror and looked at myself and said, ‘Now look here, Stephanie Mills, you’re out here in California, you’re alone now, and YOU…ARE…GOING…TO…MAKE IT.

Damn…guess their union unfortunately wasn’t meant to be. We respect Ms. Mills for sharing her vulnerabilities with the world though.